THIS JOKE IS FOR SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO THE SMART GUYS WHO CAN HANDLE IT.
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman=pregnancy
______________________________
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn’t need.
_____________________________
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
_____________________________
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
______________________________
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
Guys do not promise your woman too early that you love her so much to go through hell for her. After married you would really get there.
______________________________
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.
_____________________________
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________
WOMAN – Even if you are smart, take note:
At 18 – You are a football, 22 men going after you.
At 28 – You are a hockey ball, 8 men going after you.
At 38 – You are a golf ball, 1 man hitting on you.
At 48 – You are a ping-pong ball, 2 men pushing to each other.
MAN – Even if you are a smart guy, dont laugh at the woman yet.
At 20 – You are like a coconut, so much to offer, so little to give.
At 30 – You are like a durian, dangerous but delicious.
At 40 – You are like a watermelon, big, round and juicy.
At 50 – You are like a mandarin orange, the season comes once in a year.
At 60 - You are just like a raisin, dried out, wrinkles and cheap.
Continue to be smart and happy!
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman=pregnancy
______________________________
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn’t need.
_____________________________
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
_____________________________
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
______________________________
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
Guys do not promise your woman too early that you love her so much to go through hell for her. After married you would really get there.
______________________________
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.
_____________________________
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________
WOMAN – Even if you are smart, take note:
At 28 – You are a hockey ball, 8 men going after you.
At 38 – You are a golf ball, 1 man hitting on you.
At 48 – You are a ping-pong ball, 2 men pushing to each other.
MAN – Even if you are a smart guy, dont laugh at the woman yet.
At 20 – You are like a coconut, so much to offer, so little to give.
At 30 – You are like a durian, dangerous but delicious.
At 40 – You are like a watermelon, big, round and juicy.
At 50 – You are like a mandarin orange, the season comes once in a year.
At 60 - You are just like a raisin, dried out, wrinkles and cheap.
Continue to be smart and happy!
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